A little refresher ~ Making your way in the world today takes everything you’ve got.
Taking a break from all your worries, sure would help a lot.
Wouldn’t you like to get away?
Sometimes you want to go
Where everybody knows your name,
and they’re always glad you came.
You wanna be where you can see,
our troubles are all the same
You wanna be where everybody knows
Your name.
Ah… the sweet relief of sharing the weight of the world with someone and laughing and experiencing it together. This doesn’t happen for me in a bar, but at the gym. It happens on my coaching calls or in texts with clients and friends. It happens at the dinner table or at coffee with a new friend.
This post was supposed to be about accountability. But what’s really going on is support, reflection and hope and belief.
I can’t lose the weight for you, give you energy or bring you inner calm and strength. What I do give is attention, knowledge and something else to “connect to” that is stronger than the pull to do nothing.
We all need something to get us out of inertia.
Sometimes it’s that you’ve found yourself at rock bottom. You know deep down — this is it, I’m so far from who I want to be, I have to do something… the discrepancy is usually enough to get you out of ambivalence.
BUT, it’s when you’re sort of in that gray area of, “it’s not that bad.” The effort and work doesn’t quite seem worth it. You settle. And keep settling.
What then?
Two things to ask yourself:
1) What am I getting out of this current situation? Comfort? Am I “enjoying” this martyrdom and busyness. Is it giving me a sense of purpose, even if it’s a bit of sabotage? Is being independent and figuring something out on your own a way of being that really serves you?
I’m reminded of this quote:
“If you have come here to help me you are wasting your time, but if you have come because your liberation is bound up with mine, then let us work together.” ~ Lillia Watson
How come in the business world, it’s perfectly acceptable to outsource and use knowledge and expertise in areas where its needed, but in our personal lives, it’s an extravagance? I think our wellbeing is the most important thing, but often the last priority.
But don’t look for help… seek an environment or people or a person in which “together” is the foundation. Nobody wants to be talked at or to. And you are always the expert of you.
Second question…
2) Can you let yourself be happy? Are you holding onto suffering? Let in the happiness. Let in the joy. Another lyric (this time by Lorde), “I’m addicted to a certain kind of sadness.” I hear it all the time… all the ways that something is hard, isn’t going to work, how it hasn’t in the past. Stop. Breathe. Can you let yourself be happy?
What if the journey was fun? What if it isn’t about being right all the time? What if it was about just doing the next best thing over and over? What if it was about actually celebrating wins versus moving onto the next thing?
In this moment, as you’re reading, be flooded with gratitude for this breath you took. And the next one.
It’s possible to lay down your striving, perfectionism or martyrdom. It’s possible to simultaneously be happy AND flow out of inertia. Guess what? It doesn’t mean you’re going to fail if you stop trying so damn hard. Beating yourself up does not create transformation. Settling only means more of the same.
It is possible to change your life in small, lovely ways to get what you want.
And most of the time, it has to do with connection and the sweet relief and joy that sharing your dreams, struggles and successes brings, so you’re not facing it alone. Call that accountability, if you’d like.. but it’s more fun than just “accounting” for your actions to someone else.
If you’re local to St. Charles and not sure about what to do to workout or feel lost at the gym, I offer personal training at Freedom Fitness. I’m taking on 1:1 clients, and I also have a small group that has 2 spots available in my 4-person group. Come workout with Janet and Mary (pictured above). We laugh, we talk, we sweat!! 😅
I’m also doing online/virtual personal training and health coaching and have three spots open. This is great for people who can’t make it to the gym or want to work with me and don’t live close.
I take care of planning your workouts and can give you extra homework if you want it… hee hee. Safety and results are my main priority. Nutrition support comes with my programs, too, as we create a plan that’s based on your life because I’m not a dictator.
If you’re curious at all about what it would be like to be supported and experience what it’s like, “Where everybody knows your name, and they’re always glad you came,” then hit reply and let’s chat. We may work together, we may not, but either way it will be a joyful conversation!
May you be happy. May you be at peace. May you be filled with lovingkindness (for others and for yourself). From my heart to yours.
Laura
P.S. In case you have an ear worm and NEED to hear that song right now, lol https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYcX534JqG4
P.P.S. One of my goals this year is to send out this email on regular schedule of every other Saturday. I’m sharing this for my own accountability 😆. But, what would be really motivating and inspiring is if you could write back and “Yes, Laura you got this!!! We’ll read it, so please send it!” I even made a handy button, LOL. Thank you for your support!!!
