I’ve been thinking a lot about choices and using this phrase to help me through tough times – “I’m the kind of person who ________” Fill in the blank according to the situation.
When I’m at the gym and I have that last rep to do:
I’m the kind of person who does low squats and has high standards. ?
= I take a breath and believe in myself
When my kids are really driving me nutty:
I’m the kind of person who uses 123 Magic to get them to stop fighting.
= I count instead of yell (most of the time lol)
When I have a project for work, but I’m procrastinating:
I’m the kind of person who can focus for 45 mins.
= I put the timer on and get it done and then take a break
When I need to talk to someone about something uncomfortable:
I’m the kind of person who faces what is scary and unknown.
= I actually talk to them instead of having imaginary (unproductive) conversations
I’ve been playing with that statement when I’m distracted, unmotivated or scared, and there’s something that I really want to do.
It’s like writing a post-it note to your brain.
And then action follows, so that’s pretty neat.
The point of restrictions, boundaries and rules is really about love.
For example, my personal “rule” for self care is that I get up in the morning and before I do any other life stuff, I journal or pour into myself for a little bit. Without this ritual, I get really sad. It anchors me, so I do it. It’s 100% based on love (even when I don’t feel like it).
These types of rules:
- protect self
- allow focus
- create a safe space to be who you are and to grow
- increase health
- enhances well being
The goal for me is to answer the question in the words of the wise Glennon Doyle from the book Untamed – “What is true and beautiful for you?”
But, wait. What if we’re holding on too much to rules that don’t work anymore?
What if the internal rule becomes:
- suffocating
- soul crushing
- counterproductive to growth
- harmful to self (and others)
- more about the ideology or the belief itself than what is actually happening
- something that no longer serves its purpose
The shift from one to the other is usually very, very gradual like the rotating of the Earth. We might not realize that it’s happening.
We don’t usually wake up and say out of the blue “this doesn’t feel right anymore.” It’s often more subtle and instinctive. It’s harder to hear those whispers.
For example, “I’m the kind of person who eats low carb.” In 2013, this helped me with food awareness and education. I felt so much better! It made eating fun and it helped my family. I held tight to that way of eating for years.
Slowly the restrictions that made me happy became detrimental. Read about “How being healthy made me sick.”
So, I changed thanks to an open mind and support from my trainer – yay, oatmeal!
Another whisper I had was the desire to become a health coach. I actually had a whole plan that I would start when I was 50 because I already had a successful creative business. But really, I was so damn unhappy, and it was with the help of my coach that I was able to see my way through to something different.
What’s true and beautiful for me is that I get to do both!!! Coach and create.
II know I can make new guideposts for myself and use them to my advantage for as long as they support me. It’s up to me to pay attention BEYOND just holding onto the belief.
It’s an interesting exercise to ask that question, what kind of person are you? Most of the time this isn’t something I’m thinking about consciously, but when I do ask that question of myself, I can tap into my power and I am able to answer the question of what’s true and beautiful for me.
As a coach, I help people identify what is serving them and what is not. I help people move from that whisper of “this doesn’t feel right” to “oh yeah, this is me.”
It’s hard to go from a desire to actual doing. It’s ok to ask for help. Success is much more likely when you have support, and I love, love, love helping people tap into their power, too. If you’re curious, then write me back and we can set up a free breakthrough session.
May you know and live in a way that is true and beautiful for you.
Many hugs,
Laura
P.S. I’m excited to share the second episode of Joyful Kitchen Talk!
Sarah and Laura chat about what it’s like to make 18 meals a day when you have to feed 4 boys and what is in a good Italian sauce. Just a warning, you will probably get hungry!
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I help stressed out working professionals stop destructive habits and be healthier and more joyful, so you can make lasting changes and achieve goals, even if you are busy. I do this through one-on-one coaching packages that provide a customized visual gameplan that you can actually use. Just fill out the contact form to talk to me about scheduling a complimentary breakthrough session to get started on your personal plan.
